Where Have I Been?

I hate those blog posts where people post about how they haven't been posting. Don't you hate those? Yeah. So I will leave that part out. School has been keeping me crazy busy and even today I am crazy busy studying for a test. I decided to take a few moments and fill in my blogger world on what is happening in my life. I graduate in 55 days. I am super excited. I have come a long way to get here. It's hard for me because I feel some take it for granted. I never would have guessed even 10 years ago I would be here today. Honestly when I got sick it seemed impossible that I could get here but I'm doing it. One day at a time. It's nearly pushed me over the edge of insanity but here I am.

Gabbi will be four in December. How is that for hard to believe? I started this blog when I found out I was pregnant with cancer and now my beautiful miracle baby is a healthy, happy almost 4 year old. Time flies. Pretty soon she'll watch her momma graduate. She's my little inspiration too. Don't ever give up on your hopes and dreams. Nothing can stop you, but you.

I've Done it All, But What's the Hardest??

Right now? I would say nursing school is the hardest thing I've done. Considering I'm a mom to 4 girls and well, a husband. That's hard work! lol I also was pregnant with cancer. I went through some serious trials as a child well up until I turned 18 and moved on with my life as an adult. I have always led what I called an interesting life. Hang out with me long enough, you'll see what I mean. There is never a lack of excitement. Nursing school is hard work. It's so hard that when I hear of someone coming in and just starting I feel SUPER sorry for them. You have to give up your life basically for 2 years. I did 2 years of prerequisites. Then I went to the actual nursing school for 2 years. I will graduate in December. It has been a long road and honestly there have been days when I asked myself "What the hell do you think you are doing???" I never had any idea I would be all grown up and say hey, you know what I want to be when I grow up? A nurse! That's supposed to be decided when you're young right? Well, when I was in high school my whole goal in life was to be on the news. I was going to major in radio and television broadcasting. I was going to minor in journalism. I had it all planned. Then I was 19 and got married. That was where it all changed.


I have been overloaded with homework, stress, zero family time. It's hard. I want nothing more than to cuddle with my Gabbi and pinch her little cheeks. Instead I have to tell her to go play with daddy because I have homework to do. It's hard stuff. I am getting there. It's so close I can taste it. The fear never leaves. One of my classes has 3 total tests. 2 worth 20% and the last worth 30% of my grade. There is absolutely NO room for error. You have got to be good at this stuff now. It's the home stretch!

School and Checkups

I had another healthy checkup this month. I saw my Oncologist who decided to schedule my next appointment for mid December. He wants to see me after I graduate. He offered letters of reference and referral. He keeps telling me that which is awesome.

I guess in some ways I'm kind of lucky. My desire is to work in Oncology. If I had not gone through all I went through I never would have chosen Oncology. I saw it as sad and depressing. I think the whole experience opened my eyes. When people ask how I can handle working in that field I am reminded of when I was sick. As soon as you tell someone you have cancer they look at you like you're already dead. It's true. I hated telling anyone because I wanted to stress to everyone that I wasn't a walking dead woman. I was a person, fighting an illness that I fully intended on beating. I would go in and get chemo for hours. I would sit next to other people who were getting their treatments. I would talk to them and get to know them. They all have a story. They have brothers, sisters, mothers, fathers and children who love them. They are human and being around them wasn't scary or depressing at all. It was nice having someone to sit there and talk to that knew what you were feeling. It's hard to explain but I knew after a few treatments in that Oncology was the field I needed to be a part of. I'm getting close! I hope I can inspire even one patient. That will make it all worth it.

Votes

I entered a contest with a pic of my "favorite" guy on facebook. It's really simple. The pic with the most likes wins. I have a little over 40 now. Those in the lead have over 100!!! I was winning in the beginning and now I'm getting creamed. I would really appreciate any votes I can get. So simply follow this link to my photo: http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=523108322886&set=o.28162239860&type=1&theater

To like this photo you'll have to first like the page Johnny's Italian Steakhouse. After that just click like on my photo. I appreciate the votes. I would win a few steaks. Honestly I just want to actually win something, but you can't win unless you try!

Relaxation and Wanting a Beach

This vacation has been about rest, relaxation and family. I have missed my girls and really enjoyed the time off to spend with them. It's almost over. I never really went anywhere. I read about everyone going to exotic places taking these great vacations and I haven't stepped foot out of boring Illinois. I am ready to leave this place and do something exciting. I need a beach. I want a beach!!! I graduate in December. Maybe I'll find that beach someday.