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Tuesday, August 24, 2010


Well school is back in full swing. I am enjoying this year much more than last so far. I know this year will change a lot as time goes by. I have Pediatrics the first 8 weeks of this semester. My second semester will be OB. Both of those sound good to me. Honestly this is when having kids actually benefits you. I am absolutely comfortable with it all. I can't count how many diapers I have changed. I have read baby books with each pregnancy because I like to know what is going on. I read What to Expect When You're Expecting which is a great book!

I hate that I have a story to contribute to most bad subjects though. My first daughter was by far the easiest. I thought it was going to stay that way until my second daughter turned 1. She started fainting. It's not uncommon actually. Scary things can happen. Having kids isn't all sunshine and roses. I learned first hand and the hard way. I wish things had been simple but they weren't. Right before my second daughter turned 1 I found out I was pregnant again. Yeah it was a shock and no we weren't trying. I was about 9 weeks along when I knew something wasn't right unexpectedly. I had just been to the doctor a few days earlier and had actually seen the little heartbeat on the sonogram machine. It wasn't loud enough to hear, but you could see the flutter.

About 2 days later I went back and found out my baby was gone. He had died due to chromosomal abnormalities. I know all of this because I had chosen to have tests run. I was terrified it was my fault. That is a very common reaction. I wondered about everything from the ibuprofen I took to the face wash I used. You do get paranoid. There was nothing I did though. It was a very difficult time. Shortly after is when Mikayla suddenly began passing out when she got hurt or scared. If I yelled no she was down for the count. We ran an EEG and a study that involved a lot of electrodes on her head.  In the end though it was because she had a difficult time catching her breath when scared or hurt. She no longer passes out but still has difficulty sometimes catching her breath. She's 10 now. She grew out of it. We were talking about this in Peds the other day. It just made me think about it.

Then I found out I was pregnant again. Yes yet another one and I was scared to death. I had what is called an AFP or Triple Marker test at 16 weeks. I wasn't told it was an optional test, or that they have a high false positive rate. So when my came back positive I was scared even more. I had just lost a baby, and the baby I DID have was fainting and now I was pregnant again and told the baby may be higher risk for Down's or neural tube defects. Ugh. Well after a mentally draining pregnancy she was born perfectly healthy.

Does it end there? No. Angelina was about 1 week old when I noticed a tiny pin head sized bright red dot on her bottom lip. It was a strawberry hemangioma and that sucker grew like mad. I was really scared until I learned more about it. Well actually that didn't help a lot either. Those things can grow large and disfiguring. We put her on oral steroids at 3 months of age when it was just looking ready to burst. I started documenting it early:

The prednisone worked. She didn't have to use it for too long either. We are considering laser surgery to remove the remaining color from her lip. It's still a little fat but not bad at all. They do go away with age usually but the problem is if they are growing rapidly and in a place that could disfigure or even kill, such as an airway. Here is my beautiful red head now:

You really can't tell. Of course we all know it didn't end there. I got pregnant yet again in 2007 very unexpectedly since I had been taking birth control. Long story short I was only off of it 3 weeks. lol Then I knew I was sick too and that is where the cancer story comes in.

So the next time someone wonders why I am overprotective mom, well think about it for a couple of seconds. Yes I am over protective. Yes I worry a lot. It is what it is. I doubt it will ever change! I just hope my experiences will be something I can use to help others in life. I wish someone could have told me about what was going on with Angelina's lip. I wish someone could have told me it wasn't my fault I lost the baby before I stressed out like I did. I wish that I had known my baby could live even if I had chemo and you know that wish did come true with Hope For Two

I could go on. I have led an interesting life to say the least. Now I'm back at school and will graduate in 2011! So I am pretty excited. I have come a long way. I figure these life experiences are for a reason right?


Anonymous said...

My baby girl had one of those on her forehead, it went away by the time she was 6 or so.

Woot woot in the home stretch to graduation!

Hitesh Rawat said...

you have certainly seen a lot and glad it's getting a bit easier now.....

aahh..she has big blue eyes....and couldn't even see that blot there

Ferd said...

Wow, life is crazy, isn't it!?
But it is all turning out all right! Your kids are beautiful!
Good luck and have fun in school!