Wednesday, January 14, 2009

The Anxiety Has Officially Set In!

Well I realized something today. I am doing it again. It is now January 14th. My appointment is January 22nd. I am now starting to feel every symptom in the book, or at least questioning whether or not I am. I guess the nightmares will probably start again too. I do this every single time yet I don't think about it at first. I realize I am doing it after I have worried myself to death. I always get anxious before my follow ups. The week prior is always the worst. I can tell it gets to my hubby too. I can see it in his eyes. He sort of admitted it to me last night when I flat out asked him if he was getting the jitters yet. He looked at me in such a guilty way that I laughed. Yeah I need prayers, thoughts and words of support right about now! I had a nightmare a couple of appointments ago that the doc came in, took my hubby to another room and told HIM my cancer came back. That one was odd. I haven't had any bad dreams yet. I was warned before I ever finished treatment for my cancer that this would happen. I do take some comfort in that!!

7 comments:

MaryAnne said...

I was diagnosed with cancer when I was 22 months old, so I don't remember life when I wasn't a cancer survivor, but I do remember what a relief it was to have my five-year checkup and to get that "you made it five years" all-clear. You will definitely be in my thoughts and prayers!

Sandi said...

wow MaryAnne! So young. That is scary. Congrats on being a survivor as well. I cannot wait for my 5th year!!

Wendy said...

You are an inspiration...try to stay in the moment...right now all is good and you have your beautiful baby girl. You're in my prayers and thoughts.

Mizé said...

Nothing like positive thinking and a good relax. Hope it all goes well.
xx

Sandee (Comedy +) said...

You shall remain in my thoughts and prayers Sandi. Big hug. :)

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